Saturday, April 7, 2012

Cycle Day 25 and some of Day 26-sorry its late!

I'm sorry my post for cycle day 25 is coming the morning after.  I went out with my friend last night and didn't get home until late!  But it was fun and needed!

Yesterday was kind of a weird day.  I was so tired, I wasn't sure how I was going to make it through work without falling asleep.  I came home and took a nap before going out! 

Mentally, I was so not with it.  I felt spacey.  My brain certainly was not on work and not on anything important.  I know I use this term a lot, but I felt wonky.

Physically, my breasts still hurt.  The ovary pains come and go.  I'm so nauseous, feeling like I've just been spun around 50 times!  The thought of anything sweet makes me want to hurl.

However, I have one thing that has started that I'm a little concerned about.  Last night when I went to the bathroom, there was some dark brown spotting on the paper.  This could be from a couple of things.  I could be implantation bleeding.  I know from the fact it was brown that it was older blood, could have been up to 4 days old.  It takes a while for it to all clear your body, especially when its in small amounts.  There wasn't a lot, just some brownish colored mucus.  This seems pretty typical of implantation bleeding.  Brownish mucus that can last for a week, but never a flow like your period. 

I could be from the progesterone suppositories.  They can dry the vaginal canal and irritate the cervix and cause some bleeding.  I have issues with cysts on my cervix anyway, and they bleed a little bit if they are irritated.  Come to think of it, that is almost exactly what the spotting looks like.  When I've irritated or popped one of the cysts.  Not much blood, just enough to stain your mucus....  hmmmm....

But, it could be pre-period spotting....  If that is the case, this round didn't work and no baby for us yet.

I'm trying not to think about it too much, but I didn't sleep the greatest last night.

I get up this morning and go pee, there is nothing on the paper.  An hour later when I went pee again, there was some spotting.  I just peed again about 15 minutes ago and there was hardly anything noticeable on the paper. 

It has my mind in an uproar because I feel so sure that this is the cycle.  This is the month its going to work, but what if it didn't?  I know the reality of it is that it may not have worked and we'll do this all again.  Mentally though, I'll be a train wreck.  An absolute ball of crazy for a few days.

I'm scared and worried and just feeling like I want to cry.  Instead, I think I'm going to take a nap and maybe it'll go away.

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